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Surprises that I or someone else predicted may happen at Coachella but didn’t because they were ridiculously far fetched and just silly when you actually think about them with logical mind…

Posted on April 16 2013


Daft Punk to perform with Phoenix (not me)
This obviously wasn’t going to fucking happen! If Daft Punk was going to perform at Coachella, they were going to get paid to do it. Especially with the upcoming album. The best part about this is that they were there the night before… Also, they aren’t going to perform with Phoenix at any other festivals this Summer. Time to give up the dream, people!

Kanye West and/or Major Lazer coming out with La Roux (me)
I have justification for this, I swear! I figured that because La Roux bailed last year, they owed Coachella something special. Ya, I know…

Big Boi or potentially Outkast coming out with Janelle Monae (me)
Imagine Big Boi coming out and them performing “Call The Law” or “Tightrope”!

Frank Ocean joining Earl Sweatshirt (not me)
Earl could’ve used the help.

PJ Harvey joining DJ Harvey on stage (me)
How did this not happen? Seriously?

Knife Party accepting my Facebook friend request (me, obviously)
Fuck them!

Broken Social Scene performing with every Canadian act all weekend (me)
This probably did happen, but I can’t confirm it.

Wu-Tang Clan brings out a puppet of ODB’s corpse to try and top the Tupac hologram (me)
I would have cried, for sure.

Milo would choose College instead of Coachella(me)
He didn’t, but he did look smart.

The Bizarre Love Triangle had grown into a Bizarre Lust Orgy (me)
Cannot confirm or deny, I was waiting for Daft Punk.

-Colter

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